454V8 Monster: 1989 Chevrolet Caprice

I feel like I’ve missed out by never owning a car that was painted flat black. I’ve owned cars with faded black paint, but that isn’t quite the same. I’m talking about rattle can flat black that only looks good in cloudy weather. I feel like I’ve missed out on dirty looks from my neighbors and curious questions from my inlaws. Perhaps it isn’t too late to own a flat black car, but I feel like it would put me on a path that ends in fentanyl binges on the streets of Portland, and I’ve never even been to Portland. Just too many questions to start this at my stage in life. Will I hate the weather in Portland? How do I clean bird turds off flat paint? Is homelessness as awful as looks on TV? Find this 1989 Chevrolet Caprice offered for $6000 in Minneapolis, MN via craigslist. Tip from Cory.

From the seller:
1989 chevrolet caprice
condition: fair
cylinders: 8 cylinders
drive: rwd
fuel: gas
odometer: 53000
title status: clean
transmission: automatic
Running and driving 1989 Chevrolet Caprice with a 454 big block. Built 200-4r with shift kit and beefier parts in May for $2500 from TSI Golden Valley. Engine swap itself was $3300 from TGK Maplewood. I have receipts for everything. New tires this spring. Straight piped (no cats) to x pipe to dual out with 4″ resonators. Aluminum radiator. In the last two months it got spark plugs + wires, distributor cap, ignition coil. JVC stereo. All gauges work. Electric windows work. Chrome bumpers are pretty clean plus it has the front and rear fillers. New headliner with most of the trim installed — the rest is in the trunk. Extra parts come with — rear passenger door, original hood (corners bent from storage), chrome headers that didn’t fit the engine bay, stock catalytic converter, stock air cleaner housing, etc.

AC doesn’t work. Front end is a saggy with the stock suspension plus a big block. Pulls a little to the right. The underbody is super solid, the only rot is near the rear wheel wells where the salt collected under the rocker trim. There’s probably other quirks that I can’t think of, it’s a project car there’s always something else.
Clean title in my name. Come look at it I don’t want to go back and forth with photos and questions.
***$6k firm no haggle iykyk
no trades

See a better way to drive flat? tips@dailyturismo.com
If you took all of the boy racer add ons off of it, you could have a nice sleeper.
So if you Armorall a flat black car, isn’t that shiny enough?
Seems like a reasonable price, a mere token payment on the gas bill.